Love and Care

heart drawing

There are many comparisons to be drawn from the way God loves us and the way we should love one another. One of the aspects I often think about, for example, Is how God does not sustain our lives because He needs us. God is beyond need and always suffices in Himself. So the reason why He upholds a loving bond with every living soul is simply because He loves them. He didn’t need creation Himself but He did create it out of a sincere desire to express beauty. And this idea always brings me to the consideration that we ourselves also shouldn’t be in a relationship with others because we need them. We should be in a relationship simply because we love them and because we want to express our love in beauty.

So when we find ourselves in a relationship because we are in need of someone and not simply because we love our beloved, we feel frustrated and angry when our needs aren’t met. In a way, we start to demand to have our happiness filled in by our beloved. And when our beloved isn’t capable of filling in that need and doesn’t know how to make us happy the way we wanted it, we believe he or she doesn’t love us. But we only think like that because we fail to see that we ourselves are in fact the cause of the lack of love. We are the cause because we forced someone else to care. By posing our needs and expectancies at the forefront we demanded an answer and as such we took away the possibility of genuine care ourselves, for genuine care is a heartfelt response out of love.

True love must always be a gift and its care can thus only be an answer to a request but not a reaction to a forced demand. When we take away our beloved’s choice and freedom to answer our requests, we take away the necessary condition for love to be real.

In the same way we cannot demand from God. We can only request so that He might answer out of love - and His answers often take a different form than a demand can imagine. The reverse is true as well of course: God does not demand our love and focus on Him. It’s a constant request but for our answer to be a true and genuine expression of love, it needs to flow from the freedom and choice - and the precise form is of lesser importance.

Share |